Goodbye Yellow Brick Road

where Brick= Banana and Road= Lassi

But I'm not ready to talk about that yet.

First I must tell you that I am having horrible dreams at night. In this one he was yelling at me and I was terrified. And I woke up and it was four in the morning and I had to shut all my windows and close my door because I was shivering in bed. And when I woke up again in was 7 and everyone was out in the courtyard singing goodbye to Havilah who left today by train by plane to return home from her year here.

And I wanted to stick my head out the window and say "The invalid in the corner room says goodbye to you too and wishes you safe tavel." But I didn't want the attention. Instead I lay in bed and smiled. Goodbyes are always sad.

And I'm sick again.

On Friday Anita and Steffi and I caught a metro to who knows where (well, they knew where, I had no clue because I have a horrible habit of not paying attention where I'm going, which is probably why, after living all of my life in Portland I still manage to get lost and often have to ask for directions). But we, intentionally, as this was our purpose, ended up in a very beautiful part of town where the streets were wide and the colonial houses large and looming and brightly painted. And in the side streets we found the hundreds of artisans hard at work making last minute touches on the thousands of Durga Puja idols to go out this week for the big festival. The idols are made of clay and straw (some small displays made of styrofoam) and shaped in the forms of Ganesh, and Ramayana, and of course Durga (the warrior goddess who has ten arms with a different weapon in each of them - very fierce this Durga!) and each is brightly painted and then carrried off on the shoulders of six or more men (reminiscent of the funeral processions we saw in Varanasi) and carried to all parts of Calcutta where they will be housed in bamboo structures for the festival until they are ceremoniously dunked (flung) in the river at the festival's end.

We walked along the river, got caught in the rain, huddled on a roadside bench for chai, and went to Kalighat.

And then came Saturday.

I awoke, ate my morning banana lassi, emailed, went to the store. And then had to drag myself back to my room, surprisingly weak and barely able to make it into bed. Steffi woke me up two hours later saying they were leaving for the zoo. My stomach felt horrible, but I hate missing things, so I pulled myself out of bed and off to the zoo I went.

(In my mind I was remembering the trip to the zoo I took in Chiang Mai, Thailand. It was me and six of the monks I was teaching English to. They all wanted to buy me a drink, and since I couldn't accept from one and not from all, I walked around the zoo with six soda's in my hands while they would point to an animal and exclaim, "Look Garakate, an elephant!" And I would laugh and ooh and it was such a wonderful day)

The zoo in and of itself wasn't remarkable. I mean it was a nice zoo, but not all that different from others. But it was a lot of fun because we took Sadatma (I think that is his name, like directions, I'm finding names hard to remember). Sadatma is a Bengali (teenager maybe?) who, for lack of a better word is a bit simple minded. He's shown up for the past year to help some of the volunteers and they give him food, clothes, and money at the end of the day. They discovered he had never been to the zoo before, so we took him (he doesn't speak, but I've never seen anyone utter so many happy squeals in my life! He was completely captivated by the Giraffes and just kept laughing and laughing). It was a fun trip, as the volunteers decided to make it his impromptu birthday (which was unfortunate for Nicolai, whose birthday it was in actuality) and bought him ice cream and peanuts and pranced with him all over the zoo.

And the whole time my stomach moaned. And each step got slower and slower.

And it was really too bad. Because, as said before, it was Nicolai's birthday and we had been planning with excitement all week of the pizza we were going to eat - with real Italian cheese at a real Italian restaurant (these things are very exciting.) And I heard it was a lot of fun. I however, spent the evening puking banana lassi in the toilet and moaning softly in my bed.

Turns out I can't eat anything here.

Maybe my next trip will be to the Greek Isles :)

I was afraid it was going to be all the same sickness all over again. And I admit to crying forlornly under my mosquito net. But I'm recovering quickly, and hoping it was all just a bad lassi and nothing more. And I am continually thankful to have so many people around me. Felicity, in her motherly way, checked on me every couple of hours and brought me tea and toast. Anita fell asleep on my floor by my bed (as she also didn't feel well) and then brought me 7up, toilet paper, and biscuits and played backgammon with me. And Steffi brought me electrolytes and Stan took my temperature and even though it is all a miserable deja vu - it's very comforting to not be alone. Because to be alone and sick is the most horrible thing. As I well know.

And so I made a list of everyone I wanted with me:

Nathan because he is a nurse and I remember him carrying me to his car that horrible horrible night. And I'll never forget that. And later flowers and soup. Best nurse ever!
Jacob because I have a new story idea inspired by sickness and wanted to share
Chris because Chris is Chris and I wouldn't have to explain, he would just know
Jessica, because she would make everything beautiful and make sense
Sarah because she would distract me with stories of Puck and other things and possible even say "poor, poor thing" and I love my sister
Poki because I always want Poki.
Kristy and Amy because they are my Kristy and Amy and there is no replacing them
SueLynn who would be practical in face of my irrationality, and would play card games and commiserate
Amanda who would sit with me and watch Pride and Prejudice a hundred times if need be
My Dad because he would make me food in the kitchen and he makes me feel safe
My Mom because when sick, there is no on who will ever replace my mom

And I made this list in my bed for hours. And I'm pretty sure every single one of you was on it. And when I was done. I didn't feel alone at all. In fact, I feel so completely surrounded by people that all there is to do is keep on keepin' on.

Still, the Greek Isles sound nice, huh? :)